Breaking Alexandria Read online

Page 2


  “I don’t know what you expect from me, Alexandria. I refuse to just sit here and watch you self-destruct.”

  I stared at my mother as she spoke. She looked tired, the kind of tired that came from worrying. Her blonde hair was hanging limply around her face, and there were lines around her mouth and eyes that I hadn’t noticed before. Her hazel eyes that were identical to mine had fear in them. I felt a twinge of guilt for causing her any worry, but I pushed it away.

  “I don’t expect a damn thing from you.”

  If there were a medal for sneaking out of the house without getting caught the most times, I’d be the recipient for sure. I smiled to myself as I slowly slid open my bedroom window. I glanced down to the yard below. It was illuminated by the streetlight across the road from our house. I squinted as I looked around, checking for movement of any kind.

  After I was sure that it was safe, I climbed onto my window ledge. There was a large oak tree in our yard, and several of the branches were touching our house. One was positioned perfectly, so I could crawl onto it right from my window. I silently slipped onto the limb and made my way down the tree, glancing up at my window every few seconds. While I considered myself a badass escape artist, I never felt safe until I was out of our yard. I always expected my mom to appear in my window and start shouting at me.

  I crossed the yard, staying in the shadows as I went. It was well after midnight, and there wasn’t a soul around. Once I made it to the sidewalk, I jogged until my house was out of sight. I felt sweat on the back of my neck as I hurried along.

  June was always a hot month in Ohio, but it wasn’t as bad as July or August. I dreaded those months and the unbearable heat that would come with them. My pale skin hated the summer sun, so I would try to stay out of it as much as possible.

  Joel was used to my escape routine, and he was waiting for me a block away. I couldn’t keep the grin off my face when I saw him sitting on his motorcycle at the corner of the block. I took the helmet that he handed to me, and I pulled it over my head. His bike roared to life as I slipped on the back of it, and I wrapped my arms around his stomach. He pulled away from the curb and headed to his house.

  A huge party was going on there tonight. Joel would usually have one or two parties a month at his house. I loved them. They were crazy and stupid and everything I expected from a party. Because of the amount of people that came, the parties would stay in the backyard since it was completely enclosed with a privacy fence. He was always careful of who was allowed in. Alcohol and drugs were a major part of them, and he didn’t want to take a chance on someone turning him in to the police. He’d managed to stay off their radar for the most part, and neither of us wanted him to catch their attention.

  Pulling up to the house, we could hear the music blaring as soon as he shut off his bike.

  “Damn it. I told them to keep it down. If someone calls the cops on us—”

  “I’ll take care of it,” I said as I pulled the helmet off my head.

  Before he could stop me, I was off the bike and heading for the house. I walked inside and made my way to the back door. As soon as I opened it, I winced from the beats coming from the speakers.

  “Yo! Riley! Turn the fucking music down!” I shouted as I pushed through the crowd to where he was standing.

  Riley was one of Joel’s closest friends. I’d met him before Joel and I became an item, and Riley and I had ended up becoming really good friends. He partied with the same crowd as us, but I’d never once seen him deal or use drugs. He drank, but that was it.

  He grinned at me when he noticed me shoving my way to him. “Lexi! It’s about time you showed up!”

  “Turn the damn music down before someone calls the cops!”

  “Oh shit, sorry.” He lowered the volume to the point where my ears weren’t bleeding. “Better?”

  “Much.”

  “I was wondering if you were going to make an appearance tonight.”

  “Don’t I always?” I asked.

  “Well, Joel said you were having some parental issues, so I wasn’t sure.”

  That was an understatement. My mom had kept me under house arrest for almost two weeks since she’d caught me coming home with Joel that afternoon. I’d felt like a prisoner in my own house, and I hadn’t been handling it very well. It had seemed like my mom and I were fighting constantly because of my attitude.

  “My trusty tree has yet to fail me,” I teased.

  Riley laughed. “You’d think your parents would wise up and cut that damn thing down.”

  “Let’s hope they don’t. I really don’t want to jump out of a second-story window.”

  “Why not? It might be fun.”

  I rolled my eyes. “I’m sure it would be. I’m going to go find some booze. Behave yourself.”

  “Always do.”

  I weaved through the mass of bodies as I headed for the drink table. Now that I wasn’t pushing through like a maniac, it was hard to move. Most of the people here towered over my five-foot-three frame. Usually, I liked being tiny—it made me feel cute—but I hated it right now.

  I finally pushed through the crowd and grabbed a red cup off the table. I made a rum and Coke that had way more rum than Coke and then leaned against the table. I could see most of the party from where I was standing. I watched as people laughed, drank, and danced around me.

  Off to the side, a few groups were doing something else entirely. I watched as a guy lit up a bowl and took a hit from it. I finished my drink and walked over to where he and several others were sitting. They glanced up as I approached.

  “Care to share?” I asked.

  “You’re Joel’s chick. Of course we’ll share,” Bowl Guy said.

  He looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t place him. He might have been a classmate of mine or someone I’d sold to for Joel. Either way, I didn’t care.

  I took the lighter and bowl from him. I lit the bowl and inhaled deeply, letting the smoke fill my lungs. I held it in for as long as I could before blowing it out of my nose.

  I loved the smell of weed. I knew a lot of people hated it, but I found it comforting. I’d come to associate it with everything important in my life—Joel.

  I took another hit before handing the bowl back. “Thanks.”

  “Welcome,” Bowl Guy said.

  He glanced behind me just as a pair of arms wrapped around my waist.

  “There you are,” Joel said as he nuzzled my neck.

  “Here I am.” I snuggled back into his arms, so our bodies were pressed together.

  “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”

  “I’ve been around. I made Riley turn his music down,” I said as I felt the weed starting to relax me.

  “So I heard. What are you doing over here?”

  I glanced at Bowl Guy. “Making friends.”

  Joel laughed. “You don’t need to make friends with random guys just to get high. I can take care of you.”

  I turned in his arms and looked up at him. “You’re very good at taking care of me.”

  And he was. No matter what it was, Joel always took care of me and helped with whatever I needed. Need a place to stay because my mom and I were fighting? Go to Joel. Need something to relax me? Go to Joel. Need some extra cash? Go to Joel. Need someone to hold me as I cried? Go to Joel. Hell, he’d even helped me with my math homework more than once. He was a damn genius when it came to school shit.

  “I try.” He kissed me lightly. “Come on, let’s go sit down and laugh at the drunk idiots.”

  He held my hand as we weaved through the crowd. He sat down in a chair on his back porch and pulled me down onto his lap. I settled back against his chest as we watched the party in front of us. I never understood why Joel threw parties. He would drink and party occasionally, but it was rare. Most of the time, he simply watched everyone else and kept an eye on me when I was drunk.

  Riley came over a few minutes after we had sat down. I smiled as he handed me one of the drinks he was car
rying. I loved that kid. He knew the way to my heart – alcohol.

  “What are you two lovebirds up to?” he asked as he sat down in the chair beside us.

  “Making babies,” I said as I grinned at him.

  “Ew…that was more than I needed to know.”

  I shrugged. “You should be used to us by now.”

  He shook his head as he stood up. “I like you both, but I think I’m going to find someone else to hang out with. Hopefully, she’ll have boobs and be single.”

  I laughed as he walked away from us. Riley was a good guy but still a guy. He would go through a lot of girls, and very few of them had seemed to care about it. I couldn’t blame them though. He was hot by anyone’s standards. His blond hair was cut short at the moment, but I’d seen him grow it out until it brushed his shoulders. Either way looked good on him. His eyes were a pale blue color, and they were probably my favorite things about him. They made him look vulnerable even though he wasn’t. He could lay someone out faster than I could blink when he needed to. He was protective of his friends, especially Joel, and he didn’t fuck around when someone pissed him off.

  “I’m glad you sneaked out. These parties are boring without you,” Joel whispered in my ear.

  “Yeah, right. I’m sure you’d be bored if I weren’t here,” I teased.

  “I would. I’d be sitting here by myself with no one to talk to.”

  “I’m sure someone would talk to you.” I thought for a moment. “Well, maybe. You do scare a lot of people away.”

  “I haven’t scared you away yet.” He kissed me behind my ear.

  I shivered. “And you won’t. You’re stuck with me.”

  “I don’t mind—at all.” He paused to kiss my ear again. “Will you stay with me tonight?”

  My insides clenched at the thought of staying in his bed all night. “You know I will.”

  I knew my mother would probably lock me in a cage when she woke up and saw that I was gone, but I didn’t care. It would be worth it as long as I got to spend the night with Joel.

  “I was hoping you’d say that. I have some runs tomorrow, but I’ll take you home before I leave.”

  When Joel said runs, he meant his drug deals. I hated the fact that he did them simply because I hated that he was constantly around addicts, but I’d come to accept it as a normal part of our lives. He was one of the most in-demand dealers in our area, so he would go on a lot of them. He’d been doing this for a long time, and he knew what he was doing, but that didn’t mean I didn’t worry about him all the time.

  Most of his clients were casual users looking to get high once in a while. A few were hardcore addicts though, and they scared me. When people were desperate for their drug, they would do anything they could to get it. Joel had beat the shit out of people more than once when they tried to steal from him.

  “I don’t want to go home tomorrow. I’ll help you with your runs.”

  “You sure? Your mom will freak if you don’t go home.”

  I shrugged. “She’ll freak anyway. I’ll text her tomorrow to let her know I’m fine.”

  “As long as you’re sure. She’ll probably lock you away for the rest of the summer.”

  “No, she won’t. I’ll just leave again. I’ll hide out here or something.”

  “She’ll look here first.” He pointed out.

  “True. I’ll figure something out. Nothing in this world will keep me away from you.”

  I turned to face him. The party around us faded away as my lips brushed his. We were the only two people in the entire world. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I kissed him deeply.

  “I love you,” I whispered.

  He smiled. “I never get tired of hearing you say that.”

  I opened my mouth to reply, but before I could, someone said, “Joel…”

  We both turned to see a girl standing next to us. I rolled my eyes when I realized who it was. Tasha was one of the chicks who I’d had words with more than once. She was Joel’s age. I thought they had gone to school together or something like that. She’d been chasing Joel since right after we got together, and she’d done everything in her power to try to break us up. Her attempts had failed miserably, but I still hated her.

  I couldn’t help but smile when I saw how bad she looked. It was obvious that she was in need of a fix.

  “Tasha,” Joel acknowledged her.

  “You got a second?” she asked, completely ignoring me.

  “What’s up?”

  “I need to talk to you”—she finally glanced in my direction—“alone.”

  I rolled my eyes again but stayed silent. Regardless of the fact that I hated her, she was Joel’s client, so I had to play nice.

  “We’re as alone as we’re going to get. What’d you need?”

  She went back to ignoring me as she stepped closer and rested her hand on his shoulder. “I need some cocaine.”

  I forced myself not to push her hand away from him. I didn’t want her to touch him.

  “How much do you need?” he asked.

  “Just a little bit, but the thing is…I don’t have any cash right now.”

  Joel’s face turned hard. “I don’t do charity, Tasha. You know that.”

  “It wouldn’t be charity! I’ll pay you next week, I swear. You know you can trust me.”

  “Not happening, Tasha. Go find someone else to bug,” Joel said.

  “Please! I’ll do anything you want. You know, you used to let me pay you back with something other than cash.” Her tone was flirty.

  Joel’s entire body tensed underneath me. “Not happening.”

  She ran her fingers down his arm as she smiled at him sweetly. “Come on, I’ll let you go bareback if you want.”

  “I’m sitting on his fucking lap in case you haven’t noticed,” I said, unable to stay quiet any longer. I couldn’t believe that she had the nerve to offer him sex as payment while I was two inches away from her. She reeked of desperation.

  She looked down at me like I was nothing more than an annoyance to her. “So what?”

  “Tasha, leave—now,” Joel said, his tone cold.

  “Come on, baby, you know I’m more fun than she is.”

  “He told you to leave.” I made a shooing gesture with my hand. “Listen to him. Go.”

  “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Fine by me,” I said casually.

  Joel gave me a confused look, but I only winked. Before Tasha could figure out what I was about to do, I stood and smiled sweetly at her. The next few seconds seemed to pass in slow motion as I drew back and punched her in the face. I heard a sickening crack, and I grinned as I realized that I’d just broken her nose. As soon as she went down, I was on top of her, punching any part of her that I could reach. The bitch had known better than to mess with me.

  Strong arms wrapped around me, and I was pulled off of her. I kicked out, trying to free myself.

  “Stop fighting me, Lexi!”

  I instantly stopped struggling when I heard Joel’s voice. I let him pull me away as Tasha’s friends gathered around her to help her stand. Her face was covered in blood, and one of her eyes was already blackening.

  I smiled in triumph as I looked at her. “I hope you’ll listen next time he tells you to leave him alone.”

  “You’re fucking crazy!” she moaned.

  “Maybe I am, but maybe you should learn not to offer your vagina up to my boyfriend right in front of me, you crack whore.”

  “Everybody out!” Joel shouted at the crowd surrounding us. He was mad, really mad. He rarely yelled, and he never ended a party early.

  People scrambled to the one exit in the privacy fence, pushing each other to get out. No one wanted to deal with a pissed-off Joel. Riley stood off to the side and waited until everyone was out, so he could lock the gate. I’d never in my life seen this place clear out so fast.

  “You got it?” Joel asked.

  “I’ll make sure they’re gone for sure. Go take care of Lex
i,” Riley said as he glanced at me. It was rare for him to be so serious.

  I knew I was in trouble with both of them. Shit.

  Joel picked me up and carried me inside his house. He walked straight to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  He started stripping me. “Your clothes and your body are covered in blood. We need to get rid of it.”

  “Oh.”

  I hadn’t even noticed until he said something. Now, I saw the blood on my knuckles and on my shirt as he tossed it onto the floor.

  “Go shower. Tasha is crazy as fuck, so I’m going to go burn these. I don’t want her to go to the police, and then they find these.”

  I was silent as he left the room with my clothes balled up under his arm. Truthfully, I wasn’t too worried about Tasha turning me in to the cops, but I was concerned that Joel might get pulled into it somehow. I didn’t want that.

  I stepped into the shower and let the water wash away the blood on my skin. I felt the tension leave my body as I washed my hair. I wasn’t going to worry about Tasha right now. She was too desperate for drugs to turn in the girlfriend of one of the biggest dealers in the city. If she did, no one would go near her. She wouldn’t fuck herself over like that.

  I shut off the water and grabbed a towel to dry off with. Joel hadn’t come back inside to bring me clothes yet, so I walked to his bedroom, naked. I kept spare clothes here for the nights I would stay over or in case I needed them. I opened the dresser drawer I used and pulled out underwear and one of Joel’s old shirts that I loved to sleep in.

  After I had clothes on, I crawled into his bed and pulled the covers up to my chin. I always felt so safe here in his bed. It was like he could protect me from everything bad in the world. I never wanted to leave.

  I heard Joel walking down the hall. He appeared in the doorway a few seconds later. He pulled his shirt over his head, and then his jeans went next. I watched him as he undressed. While I took in every part of his body, I shivered as memories of us being together flooded my brain. I wanted him, but I knew he was mad at me for what I did.

  He pulled the covers back and crawled into bed beside me. I was surprised when he took me into his arms and pulled me tight against his chest.